Working with the Origins of Pain

Working with the origins of pain takes on many paths. Physical issues are usually associated with pain. it is often defined as a discomfort. However, different forms of pain can change how you view and experience life. It can be embodied in your thoughts, feelings and beliefs about how this pain impacts your ability to meet life. It is also the discontent that creates suffering for the inability to return to the life you had before the trauma, accident or illness occurred.

In some cases, these negative perceptions and limitations expand into proliferation of pain into long- term suffering. The inability to acknowledge what is happening leads to difficulties in processing the need for change to adapt to the life you are presented in current challenges.

The Origins of Personal Pain

Suffering can also be traced to generational patterns. Recently, I read the book, Caste: The Origins of Our Discontents and saw the movie based on the story of the author’s journey in writing the book.. In an interview about the film, the actor who portrayed the author of the book Caste, was asked how she could dive into the grief and pain she worked with in her part, reponded that she carried the generational grief of her ancestors who suffered at the hands of slavery.

There are many stories of people who through acknowledging the truth of a challenging situtation they were experiencing,were then able to use that experience to catapult them into a greater sense of meaning in life. This process included honoring the truth, sharing that knowledge with compassion to others as an instrument of personal and community transformation.

As an example, In the film, Origin, the author experiences three major losses in her life within a 6-month time frame including her husband, her mother and closest friend who was her cousin. The places where you experience emotional pain from loss feels like a separation from love, support and connection, and this can proliferate long-term suffering that limits your access to life.

Too much or too little resistance affects how you approach life. Avoiding pain amplifies suffering by way of intensifying excess immobilized energy within your system. Although your system might perceive this protective mechanism as a way to survive, energetically this interrupts or diconnects you from the pathways toward acceptance, decision-making, and new possibilties. It creates a ripple effect that changes and de-energizes your body-mind-spirit system. Depression, anxiety, guilt and confusion decrease your ability to emerge from suffering without the energy and motivation to move towards what is life-enhancing.

The acceptance on the author’s part in the film came when she realized that she no longer had the words and encougagement from her loved ones who motivated her to write the book, Caste, so she would have to accept the truth to commit to encouraging and motivating herself.

With acceptance comes the ability to choose your response to a painful situation at hand. :Acceptance allows you to see what is happening with greater clarity, to see not only where you are in the picture, but the bigger picture as well. Acceptance offers you the option of considering all of the possible pathways through inner guidance.This, then allows you to consider what aligns you with what is most beneficial, energizing and life-enhancing in the given circumstances, and to choose a path with discernment, self-care, with compassion for yourself and others with your true values.

“Looking beneath the history of one’s country is like learning that alcoholism or depression runs in one’s family or that suicide has occurred more often than might be usual or, with the advances of medical genetics, discovering that one has inherited the markers of BRCA mutation for breast cancer. You don’t ball up in the corner with guilt or shame at these discoveries. You don’t if you’re wise, forbid any mention of them. In fact you do the opposite. You educate yourself.”
~Isabel Wilkerson, Caste: The Origins of Our Discontents

The Origins of Collective Pain

The book and film address the origin of caste systems that regulate hierarchy and racisim across the planet, and addresses the material as both a place that separates us from ourselves and each other across the world.The research for her book led her to rely on the examples from history still existing in the world today. She sought out stories of people who rebelled against opression and shined a light on the truth of heirarchy and oppression from the past histories of slavery in the United States, the rise of Hitler and the Holocaust and the Caste System of India.. She studied researchers and leaders deemed the “lowest caste”who nevertheless stood up to advocate for freedom, social justice and human rights.

“Caste is insidious and therefore powerful because it is not hatred, it is not necessarily personal. It is the worn grooves of comforting routines and unthinking expectations, patterns of a social order that have been in place for so long that it looks like the natural order of things.”~Isabel Wilkerson, Caste: The Origins of Our Discontents

Many people today still carry the burden of patterns from the past. According to Family Systems, 80% of our family material is unconscious.We see this when groups of people still live out historical separations whether this be religious, racial, social status, money or resource-based, gender, language, territory, age, etc.

The collective pain that continues to show up today shows up in war, the response to climate change, the pandemic and mass refugee and immigration issues. The victim-perpetrator cycle is the reflection of personal and global pain that have not yet been healed.

Each one of us has a story that includes pain. Where there has been loss, grief, fear, physical injury, abuse, trauma or unresolved hurt there is a message that needs to experience the truth. This happens with the acknowledgement of unmet life needs and meaning for you today from the injury that created separation from all of the parts of yourself, or blocked your connection to others whether it originated in your own life or those of your ancestors.

Using Origins of Pain to Create New Pathways

‘Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedom~to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.’ ~Viktor E.Frankl

It is a personal journey. Willingness is a factor that contributes to your thinking, feeling, and beliefs about what you are facing. Taking care of yourself is primary when you want to move in a new direction. This is based on a point of choice for the journey with checkpoints that remind you of your positive intentions based on new possibilities. Motivation follows as you experience greater awareness. This creates hope paired with any positive actions. as you choose your own way.

 It is the kindred connection from a place of deep knowing that opens your spirit to the pain of another as they perceive it.~Isabel Wilkerson

Resonance Repatterning® works with personal and generational pain related to trauma stored within from your life as well as lifetimes of victim-perpetrator cycles. Sessions identify origins of pain in your unconscious material. Working with personal and generational patterns creates restoration of optimal life energy flow within your physical, emotional, mental and spirit parts.

This allows you to create a new vision for your own life with greater coherence, author-ship and life enhancing patterns to end the victim-perpetrator cycles. With freed energy available, this empowers your ability to live and communicate your truth in action. As a result, seeing and reclaiming more of your Self, you are better able to see others more fully with greater compassion and understanding. This empowers the possibility for postive personal and collective change in healing the origins of pain.

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Kimberly Rex, MS is an Advanced Resonance Repatterning® practitioner, Person-Centered Expressive Therapist, and Wellness and Well-being Life Coach. She works with people all over the world via Skype, by phone, in-person, and by proxy.

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