Posted by Kimberly Rex
Hosting Love Within
Hosting love in your life starts from within. This is created by nourishing safety and trust in your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs you choose to communicate and act upon in any given moment . It is rooted in self-love, setting healthy boundaries, self-reflection and self-regulation.
“Find the love you seek, by first finding the love within yourself. Learn to rest in that place within you that is your true home.” ~Sri Sri Ravi Shankar
Hosting Love Begins with Self-Love
Self-love leads to self care. This means that you develop compassion for your life on the emotional, mental, physical and spiritual levels. By doing so you embrace all of the parts of yourself that experienced pain as well as the parts that have been there for you when you needed to meet challenges. Being able to listen to what is happening within gives you information that supports your beliefs, thoughts and behaviors that have molded your life, as well as giving you a template to work with to sculpt the new life you would like to experience
Early in life, your response systems to stress were structured by what you learned from your family and caregivers. Difficulty loving yourself shows up in your adult relationships when you have experienced a painful experiences created by absence, inconsistency, or abuse that instilled a lack of safety and trust.
As you learn to compassionately take care of your needs and wants in life today, you give yourself a way to ground and expand your awareness beyond your automatic responses. This allows you to be present in the moment with a more expansive view of what you are experiencing. It also then allows you to call up on these insights to see what is happening with other people.
Hosting Love with Healthy Boudaries
Boundaries are necessary for your health and well-being. Your body gives you signals that tell you when you feel elated or ill at ease. Your stomach might churn, your muscles tighten, and your heartbeat races. Over time when you do not establish boundaries based on what will create safety and security for your wellness and well-being, your body signals in stronger messages. This could include headaches, difficulty with digestion, physical mobility, or life-depleting conditions. These signals speak to you on the cellular level to express the need for establishing limits.
Through resonance on the unconscious level, you will continue to draw to you the relationships that contain the puzzle pieces of your early Social Engagement System.Your adult relationships will continue to give you the components of your first relationship with your parents. The limiting embodied protective automatic responses will create anxiety, stress, mistrust, fear of being vulnerable, emotional unavailability, neediness, or caretaking,
Your system might have learned to tough it out, tolerate or ignore signals that indicate danger or boundary crossing due to conflict resolution styles of your parents, abandonment, separation, loss, traumatic experiences or addiction to guard against pain.
Today, as an adult, when faced with the need to set a healthy boundary in your life for yourself or with others, you might not speak up, lash out, isolate, leave, or attempt to please the other to keep the peace. Your system defaults to early and habitual patterns you learned to handle trauma.
Loving yourself gives you the ability to connect to others in new ways that create discernment, safety and trust. It allows you to trust your internal feelings, body sensations and values. By doing so you create a healthy environment for trusting yourself and others that are worthy of trust, moving toward what is life-enhancing or away from what is life-depleting to allow healthy bonding and connection with self-care and boundaries in place.
Anatomy of Trust with B.R.A.V.I.N.G. from Brene’ Brown
Hosting Love with Self Reflection
Hosting love with self-reflection is key to healing limiting beliefs, thoughts and automatic reactions is through bringing to awareness or making conscious how these limiting patterns established through your life and Family System. Your parents and likely their parents experienced these life-depleting ways of dealing with closeness and conflict. You received this teaching through their words, actions and behaviors. The resulting negative beliefs get projected onto your adult relationships with automatic limiting beliefs such as “Love causes pain,”You cannot trust (fill in the blank),” It is my fault,” “They will leave me,”“Love hurts.” (They is used to represent any type of relationship).
It is important to acknowledge that you have the ability to work with and change these automatic reactions from the past by examining the roadmap of these patterns when they come up.According to Gabriella Kortsch, PhD, self-regulation starts with your intention and desire to become aware enough to be reflective with your ability to notice how you are perceiving whatever is happening. This includes your ability to notice how you are reacting and interpreting what is happening through your thoughts, feelings and inner dialogue. This awareness then leads you to remembering that you have choices about next steps throughout the entire process, and you can choose what is good for your own life.
Hosting Love with Self Regulation/Soothing
Taking time to self-reflect is vital to hosting love within.This is where choices show up. Triggers show up in everyone’s life. Smoking, drinking, binging, shopping, high risk or adrenalin rising behaviors, overeating, shopping, binge watching movies, workaholism, etc. can be external go-to’s when unease arises. While this might work on a short term basis, this doesn’t lead to resolving the issues so you can experience something new in your life related to what you would truly like to experience.
How you regulate your response to triggers that create agitation, anxiety, fear, grief and pain that numb or delay the pain temporarily feeds the established neural pathways of pain from the past, or you can choose natural ways to create nurture and support within.
Hosting love by choosing natural ways to self-soothe to create calm in your system trains your body-mind-spirit system by regulating how you respond to stress leads to greater wellness and well-being for the long-term. You are designed for self-healing. Focusing on new go-to’s that respond to the question, “Is this kind?” while considering next steps is a great way to work with Self-Reflection.Will the response you choose lead to new healing pathways within by activating your Sympathetic Nervous System (rest, digest, calm, and heal)? Will the choices strengthen your ability to host more love within as you navigate your life and relationships?
The following two articles give you some ideas for this purpose:by finding neutral to create positive change in your life and using your innate senses to create natural endorphin stress responses. You can explore this website for other natural modalities including breath, movement, acupressure, meditation, gratitude, aromatherapy, light, sound, etc. for more ideas.
Posted by Kimberly Rex
Getting in Sync with Water Chakra in the Fall Season
Resonance Repatterning works with a number of holistic disciplines including the Chakra System and Polarity Therapy. Fall is a time to get in sync with the wisdom from the Water or Sacral Chakra associated with this season. Located 2 inches below your belly button, the primary organs related to this energy center are the reproductive organs, pancreas; bladder; lower intestines, pelvis, genitals, and lymphatic system.
Water Chakra Qualities
This chakra embodies the energies of pleasure and taste. At this time of year, we harvest the fruits of the year and acknowledge the abundance within our lives with what has been created throughout the seasons. It is an invitation to look at balancing pleasure with temperance as the season changes.
Changing weather and temperatures let us know that it is vital to store energy for the winter coming. In the process, our energy moves from the outward journey into inner reflection. Like the plants, life energy begins its journey into the roots to store energy during this time of increasing hours of darkness.
Taking pleasure is related to both giving and receiving. Nature’s stored life energy in seeds and bulbs are ways to keep the circle of life replenished. In the same way, sharing what you have created with others is beneficial to keeping the energy currents of relationships open.
Honor the light and sound frequencies of the “Sweetness” or “Seat of the Soul Chakra. The light frequency is orange. You see this fall frequency in the trees and plants. and leaves at this harvest time. The orange color you see in pumpkins, squash, sweet potatoes, and melon are wonderful nourishment for both your vision and digestion. Anti-inflammatory herbs like Turmeric with its rich orange color can also become part of your diet in both foods and beverages. Foods that have a salty taste such as miso, seaweed, or umeboshi plum nourish your Water Chakra.
The sound frequency of the Water Chakra vibration is within the mantra, “Vam,” and the Solfeggio Frequency is held at 417 Hz.
Nourishing Your Water Chakra
Foods with high water content are also beneficial sources that connect you to the frequency of this chakra. It is an invitation to look at how you hydrate your body-mind-spirit system. Are you getting enough daily hydration, or depleting electrolytes with overdoing? Here is a Water Intake Calculator, Is your water well-filtered and from a BPA-free container?
Do you give yourself the pleasure of being close to the ocean, waterfalls, lakes, or ponds? Can you relax and soak in water whether that be a foot bath or facial steam, soaking in a tub, or sound bathing with ocean sounds? If not, find a beautiful picture of the water that you love and place it in your environment, on your cell phone or computer as a background during this season.
The frequencies from the mineral world that embody the energetics of this chakra can also be found in Carnelian for expression and creativity and moonstone for opening to the richness of life while clearing blocked lymph glands.
Like water, your life energy flow is important to support and nourish your body, mind, and core essence. Getting a massage to release tension, tightness, and crystallization is a wonderful way to cleanse and release what is keeping you from being in the flow of your life more fully. Choose a massage that feels right for you. Examples include Fascia Release, Swedish, Rolfing, Lymphatic Drainage, Network Chiropractic, or Foot Reflexology as possible choices.
Your Water Chakra and Polarity Therapy
In Polarity Therapy developed by Dr. Randolph Stone, the energy circuit for Water Chakra includes working with your chest, pelvis feet or neck, diaphragm, and perineum. You can focus your movement with an emphasis on freeing your hips, stimulating circulation in your lower body by rising on your toes, and then releasing back to standing on the ground 10 times daily. By doing so you stimulate and nourish your Kidneys for vital energy.
Be sure to include attention to your diaphragm and breathing. Practicing diaphragmatic breathing lowers stress hormones, regulates your heart rate and blood pressure, and allows you to relax more deeply. https://www.healthline.com/health/diaphragmatic-breathing#benefits
For the season of fall, you might consider Resonance Repatterning® and the sessions that work with Polarity Therapy, the Chakra System, Abundance, processing grief, Harmonizing Giving and Receiving in Relationships, Sound Frequencies, Breath, Creative Expression, Life Cycles, and Seasonal Repatterning
This is your personal invitation to harvest greater harmony and balance in your own life through accessing the natural frequencies of color, light, sound, breath, movement, consciousness science, and energetic contacts. With the Resonance Muscle-Checking process, your body reports in on what is most needed to reveal and transform blockages to restore optimal energy flow to create greater integrity in your wellness and well-being.
Kimberly Rex, MS is an Advanced Resonance Repatterning® practitioner, Person-Centered Expressive Therapist, and Wellness and Well-being Life Coach. She works with people all over the world via Skype, phone, and proxy. Set up your personal session here.
Find out more about how Resonance Repatterning benefits your life. Sign up for a free monthly newsletter with articles, natural healing modalities, and exclusive group sessions here.
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The Benefits of Exercise for Your Body-Mind System
The benefits of exercise for your body-mind system are essential for your wellness and well-being. As it gets warmer outside it’s an invitation to look at your exercise routines. This can be a good time to create new options for your body-mind system related to movement, and being more in natural sunlight while incorporating fun and nurture into your daily life.
There are many benefits to exercise. These include the reduction of inflammation and stress, as well as depression. Exercise can also help you focus better and get your creative juices going. This happens with the improvement of blood flow giving oxygen and nutrients to the brain. It also supports new brain cell growth. Research has shown that there is a link between academic performance and physical fitness as it improves the function of the Pre-frontal cortex, the thinking center of the brain. This allows better concentration, planning, organization, and calming effect.
Workouts and pleasurable activities in nature along with laughter and touch also help to create motivating, action-oriented dopamine levels and boosts endorphins, the brain’s natural pain relief and pleasure enhancers. Being in the sun also promotes the creation of Serotonin which allows you to feel more peaceful and free from worry. Examples of activities might include walking, running, outdoor Tai Chi, gardening, tennis, kayaking or canoeing, swimming, etc. Dancing can also bring pleasure, is a wonderful brain exercise, and can give you the benefits of connection with physical fitness.
Planning Time for Your Exercise
A recommendation for healthy body-mind functioning suggests that an average of 20 minutes per day inclusive of a short 5-minute walk before and after a meal is supportive for your heart, circulation, and digestion. In Qigong, the recommendation is to walk at least 100 steps after every meal to activate the digestion of your food.
A ten-minute walk in nature produces feel-good brain chemistry. You can use this time to take a mindful walk to reduce stress to combat stress hormones, especially when you are upset or frustrated as the blood rushes to the head, and your brain function centralizes in your survival brain leaving your thinking and emotional brain not as operational. This is a time to get back into a more relaxed state to bring your entire brain on board to have access to more options for the next steps in your day. It is also important to stay hydrated for this purpose to bring the energy flow of your body back up the brain stem to include your emotional and thinking brain and down into the rest of your body.
Taking Care of Your Body When You Exercise
Being in the sun is important, however, it is also vital to dress for being in the direct sun when you are taking an extended walk or exercising. Wear a hat, sunglasses, and appropriate clothing and shoes. Consider taking sunscreen, Tiger Balm, and bug repellent in your travel bag to make your time outdoors more enjoyable.
If you are taking a long road trip, it is recommended that you stop every two hours to walk and stretch your legs for at least 5 minutes. There is good nutritional information on the internet for how to warm up sustain, and cool down for workouts.
After a workout or long walk, drinking water or coconut water can help hydrate and restore your fluids and electrolyte balance. Munch on foods with magnesium like a handful of almonds or dark chocolate. You can also get the benefits of endorphin enhancer from D-phenylalanine from sunflower seeds. Replace potassium with fruits like bananas or other potassium-rich fruits. Eat candied ginger or drink ginger tea for delayed muscle soreness.
Taking Care of Your Emotions for Exercise
Emotionally, it can sometimes be very difficult to start exercising when you have depleted energy such as in cases of ill health or depression. It’s important to have an aim or direction that inspires you to move toward your growing edge. This means that pleasure, motivation, and momentum all play a role in your successful start.
If your digestion is out of whack or you have had long-term issues with your digestive system, this might be contributing to your state of mind or emotions contributing to your lack of motivation to get started. However, the good news is that any timeframe of movement and exercise will give you beneficial neurotransmitters that will allow you to feel better, while supporting your digestion in a positive way.
Starting by making a daily routine with a natural way to incorporate small movement exercises can create motivation for longer movement routines. This means that to start it’s important to map out the best times and places daily for your movement activities. Choose a few natural activities that fit your schedule and time. Whether it be on your lunch break, 10 minutes in the morning before breakfast for a walk, or after work to wind down before dinner, a safe walk with a coworker or friend or your pet, or a special place you would like to visit to walk, put these on your calendar. You can also incorporate your iPhone with messages or alarms as a reminder, or if you like, put a sticky note in a prominent place like your bathroom mirror to set the day in motion.
Know that stretching is also movement and exercise that you can use to release and calm down when you feel anxious, confused, ungrounded, or have tight muscles from sitting too long. Stretch forward and back, and side to side. You can incorporate music or look out a window at nature to start getting those feel-good neurotransmitters going. The Qigong Bounce and Hold movements are also a great daily activity that you can do in place and only takes a few moments to build your energy when you feel depleted.
Start out slowly if you need. Tune into your body, and notice any biofeedback and sensations you get when you exercise for 5-10 minutes. Increase your time when you are ready. If you are confined to a desk, chair, or bed most of the day, take 5-minute walking or stretching breaks. Take the stairs, ride your bicycle instead of your car, park your car further away from the grocery store, do yard work, wash windows, etc. Find ways to meet your movement and exercise goals as you do different chores. Add your favorite music as you take your break to inspire you. Do a happy dance when you meet your goals. This too is exercise!
Walk down the hall or exercise while your tea is heating on the stove or in the microwave, Look for free videos online that have short and gentle movements that you can complete in 5-10 minutes if needed. Here is an example of a gentle beginning workout for a sedentary life.
As you spring, walk, run, dance, stretch, or move into spring, find ways to increase your exercise for the health of your body-mind system. Enjoy your ability to mindfully see, hear, smell, touch, and taste the freedom of movement you have to experience life. Expand your ability to go forward with optimism like the new growth you see all around you in nature. Be in synch with the new possibilities life has to offer you on the emotional, mental, physical, and spirit (core essence of yourself) levels. Notice what is new and different, and take steps toward pathways of hope and optimism.
Kimberly Rex, MS is an Advanced Resonance Repatterning® practitioner, Person-Centered Expressive Therapist, and Wellness and Well-being Life Coach. She works with people all over the world via Skype, phone, and proxy. Set up your personal session here.
Find out how Resonance Repatterning benefits your life. Sign up for a free monthly newsletter with articles, natural healing modalities, and exclusive group sessions here.
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What is the Unspoken Voice of Your Body?
What is the unspoken voice of your body? This is the question Peter A. Levine, Ph.D. explores and answers in his seminal book with the title, In an Unspoken Voice. Your body stores and knows the terrain of your past experiences. It is from this history, whether pre-or post-verbal that you are facing the world today. As a practice of truly listening to the voice and language of your body, you can experience new awareness to bridge the connection between body and mind. Becoming familiar with the vocabulary of the body can give you clues as to how to monitor and potentially change outcomes where you have felt disconnected from the intelligence within and to learn to trust what you are experiencing to create positive change.
Accessing the Unspoken Voice of Your Body with SIBAM
Peter A. Levine, Ph.D. in his book, In an Unspoken Voice goes into more detail about working with self and others that paint the picture of this process of identifying what your body-mind-spirit system is reporting based on your somatic experience. SIBAM is a way to bring awareness to the channels of communication your body-mind system is offering you at any moment.
Sensation Channel
These are physical sensations that arise from within your body. This includes the tension or relaxation of your muscles. These sensations are stored in your joints, in the position of your body in space as well as in the velocity or speed of your movement. Additionally, this includes your visceral sensations including your gastrointestinal function as well as your blood vessel condition related to circulation. Your gut (enteric brain) actually sends 9x more information to the brain than the “upstairs brain” sends to the organs of your body. Your gastrointestinal system is also responsible for 95% of the serotonin production to create more calm, flexibility, and a sense of peace.
All of this feedback gives you a report on how stressed, anxious, relaxed, frightened, energized, or de-energized you might be right now. Even the absence of sensation can give you feedback about what you are not experiencing, or what you are attempting to avoid.
Image Channel
This channel accesses all of your senses creating responses to the external environment you experience, and this gets translated into your sensory memory. The overall stimuli of color, movement, sound, taste, smell, and touch transfer information that gets interpreted through the lens of your perception and body-mind system. For example, the quality of light entering your eyes is impacted by frustration, fear, grief, jealousy, unfriendliness, or competitiveness. This can create tension and have an impact on your vision when your ciliary muscles, your iris, or the six extrinsic eye muscles are overstressed or distorted. Sensory input not only affects how you connect to yourself but also to others,
Behavior Channel
Your body gestures, facial expressions, and body posture report on your intrinsic movement from within. This can translate into holding yourself in a fight-flight-freeze or collapse posture. Your behavior can also be observed through the quality of your breath cycles, heart rate, and the muscle lining of the blood vessels. Flushed skin can report embarrassment, shame, and even rage.
The pupil of your eyes reflects your state of being in the moment. When the pupil is wide open this gives a report on your arousal state and activity in your Sympathetic Nervous System wired for action. When your pupil is small this can give feedback on vulnerability, or even dissociation.
The position you take with your body when you are alone or with others can give feedback from archetypal postures. For example, pushing away, pulling toward, expanding, or collapsing your chest and shoulders, the position of your neck, standing or sitting in open or closed positions, and movement of arms, hands, and legs give feedback from the somatic perspective.
“Our feelings and our bodies are like water flowing into water. We learn to swim within the energies of the (body) senses.” ~Tathang Tulka
Affect Channel
Your emotions give you feedback on your experience somewhere on the spectrum of this feels “good”, this feels “bad” comfortable, or uncomfortable. Feelings of joy, anger, disgust, sadness, or fear are all windows to what is alive in you right now. Becoming aware of your feelings allows you to register trigger moments, as well as the experience of pleasure, beauty, and return to calm.
Meaning Channel
The meaning you give to what is alive in you right now determines how you face the world. The attitude you have about yourself and others become labels that determine your experience. Your attitudes and beliefs are influenced by your life experiences over time. Premature cognition, as Peter Levine describes, is an embedded imprint arising from past trauma and early negative conditioning at a time when your body-mind system did not have the opportunity to complete a necessary recovery process. When a sensory or memory imprint is not resolved or released, the trauma body becomes the conductor in identifying the meaning your give to your experience in life.
Putting the Unspoken Voice of Your Body Together
Putting this all together: If you had a traumatic experience in your life related to an accident or verbal abuse, for example, your body-mind system might still be registering this information in the present even though the threatening event has passed. This happens based on your earlier experience, If you believe that the world is dangerous, or that you are powerless. You might hold yourself in a different way than you would if you believed that the world is safe and you have the power to initiate the optimal movement toward or away from the direction you choose in your life. Your eyes might be wide in expression or you might look down when you speak with another person. Your shoulders might be held tightly or curved toward your chest. You might feel more rigidity in your muscles and your breathing pattern might be shallow or held in response to how you interact in triggering social or environmental situations. In response, your gut might feel knotted, and you might feel nauseous. All at the same time, you feel anxious or fearful, and your hands feel clammy or cold.
These detectors are indicators of your state of mind through your body’s voice, and it is good to become more familiar with your body’s vocabulary. Issues can arise over time when chronic stress, immobilization, fear, depression, and fight-or-flight patterns become the norm. The over-activation of your Vagus Nerve and Sympathetic Nervous System over a long period of time can lead to illness, depression, and loss of energy for your positive intentions for life.
When you acknowledge what is happening within you it is then that you have greater access to the point of choice. Changing any of these patterns: breathing, posture, movement, attitude, beliefs, facial expressions, pace, etc. can create windows to new possibilities for inner change.
Resonance Repatterning®sessions work with all of these somatic channels within the process. Resonance Muscle-Checking gives direct and particular feedback response on the physical, emotional, mental, and spirit (core essence) levels. This method accesses every muscle, tissue, organ, and gland in the body. This is done with the language your body truly understands: color, light, sound, movement, breath, aromatherapy, consciousness science, and energetic contact. And, as illustrated in the SIBAM Model, the mind goes hand and hand with what is happening in the body reflected in limiting beliefs, attitudes, and perceptions. This awareness builds the pathway for letting go of limiting patterns in your life.
Kimberly Rex, MS is an Advanced Resonance Repatterning practitioner, Person-Centered Expressive Therapist, and Wellness and Well-being Life Coach. She works with people all over the world via Skype, phone, and proxy.
Find out how Resonance Repatterning benefits your life. Set up a personal session or sign up for a free monthly newsletter with articles, natural healing modalities, and exclusive group sessions here.
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Letting Go for Good Repatterning
This Letting Go for Good Repatterning is an example of a Resonance Repatterning® process with a seasonal focus. Originally, designed for a group, it is now available for personal work as well at any time of the year. This means that if you are processing grief, a change of job, home, loss, or any life cycle change, this process will allow you to move from feeling stuck to ability to create a new direction in life.
Letting go for good is more than recycling household goods, taking out the trash, or taking bags of no longer needed clothing, furniture, etc. to Goodwill. This is a great way to clear and clean up space in your life for new possibilities. Internal letting go for good is also necessary to create greater integrity and life-enhancing energy for your health, relationships, finances, wellness, and well-being.
Letting Go for Good Resonance Repatterning® Process
In this 60-minute process, you will have the opportunity to let go of internal old tapes related to them with the following process:
- Identify what areas in your life need attention and support for letting go of what no longer serves your growth and transformation
- Let go of negative emotions, beliefs, and thoughts that go with these outdated habitual patterns
- Take the gifts or lessons from loss, disappointment, and grief to apply to your growth process
- Create coherent updates and space in your body-mind-system for new possibilities for more life-enhancing and positive choices
- Get natural modalities of color, light, movement, breath, fragrance, meditations, and energetic contact suggestions to add to your stress reduction toolkit in the Letting Go for Good eBook that will accompany this process.
Registration for Letting Go for Good Repatterning
You can register for a personal Letting Go for Good Repatterning by contacting Kimberly here.
Kimberly Rex, MS is an Advanced Resonance Repatterning® practitioner, Person-Centered Expressive Therapist, and Wellness and Well-being Life Coach. She works with people all over the world via Skype, phone, and proxy.
Find out how Resonance Repatterning benefits your life. Set up a personal session or sign up for a free monthly newsletter with articles, natural healing modalities, and exclusive group sessions here.
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